In the last days I'd gotten nervous about labor and birth (I expected it would be quite different this time, though), and anxious about the logistical issue of who would take care of Clara while we were at the birth center. My brother had agreed to be on call. Still, I said to Chris that I was hoping labor to start around 8 or 9pm, when Clara is safely in bed, so that we could have the baby overnight and hopefully be back home by breakfast. If all is well, the birth center lets families go home about 4 hours after the birth.
I'd been having lots of "practice" contractions the last few weeks, the baby was really low, but still there was no saying when the actual birth would be. At our last appointment, the midwife cautioned me not to wait too long with calling the birth center's beeper number. Clara's birth had been pretty quick for a first baby, and she was worried with all the contractions I was having I would not call right away when labor started, thinking it might go away again.
So, on Monday (August 23) I picked up Clara from day care at around 4pm, and we then took the subway to Chris's workplace. Clara had never seen it before and one of Chris's colleagues was having a barbecue party that night. We walked up the huge steep hill to Chris's office (it's in a meteorology department, complete with weather station on a tower), and had fun and good food at the party. It was pretty late (for Clara) when we got home, about 8pm. I was exhausted and so put myself on the couch while Chris put Clara to bed.
I had the first painful contraction at around 8:20pm. Now one contraction is not labor, so I was trying to see if there were more of them, and if they would be regular. When I did have a few more by 8:45 or so, Chris had put Clara to bed. I called my brother telling him to come to our house just in case. He was taking public transit, which at that time shouldn't be too bad. I told Chris the baby may actually be coming that night (I expected, in the early next morning), but I also called the birth center's beeper number. Something went wrong the first time, so after I didn't hear back from them, I called again just after 9pm and was called back by the midwife on call, Christine. Talking to her we discussed whether she needed to leave immediately (it would take her half an hour), and I mentioned that we had to wait for my brother to arrive, anyway. But Christine promised to get herself ready. It was maybe 9:15 or so.
The contractions were quite strong, and getting closer together, too. From being 5 minutes apart they went to 3 minutes apart in almost no time. I was anxious for my brother to arrive... we called him several times to discuss the best way to get to our house (take subway one stop, or walk?). Eventually the midwife called again and told Chris she was just leaving for the birth center to get prepared anyway. We had packed up all our stuff, and labor was getting really heavy. I made Chris call the taxi already (they are parked just one block away). Then he took our stuff down already... and with my brother still being on his way, I finally decided I just had to go down the two huge flights of stairs while I still could. There was barely any time to rest during the contractions. As I got downstairs, we ran into my brother on the street, handed him the keys to the apartment and hopped in the cab at maybe 9:45pm or a little later. The ride was brutal, and I cursed every red light. At this point I was worried we wouldn't make it in time.
Finally we arrived at 10pm or so (the midwife says we entered the birth center at 10:03pm). On the stairs up to the entrance of the center, I started having to push. I could barely walk - but Chris found the midwife who supported me to the birthing room. She was very calm, professional and reassuring... at this time all I could do is follow directions: Step on this mat, take off pants (with lots of help), kneel before the bed... and then I pushed, really just a few times, while the midwife gave Chris instructions (like writing down when the water broke at 10:08pm). Apparently Chris even took a second (when the midwife was pretty sure we still had another contraction or two to go) to run out, throw some money at the cab driver ("no, keep the change!") and get our stuff from the trunk. I never noticed that he was gone. At 10:10pm, Oscar came flying out onto the floor in a huge gush. They told me he had his hand up by his head (like Superman) as he came out. He was very pink and crying (Apgar score of 10 right at birth). Somehow I sat down on the floor, took of my shirt, and got to hold the slippery little bundle. It was all already over. In the next room, we could still hear the woman who was already pushing when we walked in the door...
First-ever picture of OscarThen we got to lay on the bed and rest, waiting for the afterbirth. They basically made Chris cut the cord. Oscar got to nurse (he latched on like a champ after a few tries!), and I got to eat and drink before the midwives (the back-up midwife had arrived only after Oscar was born - they usually have two present for the actual birth) took Oscar to be weighed and measured. He weighed 3020g (just a little heavier than me at my birth) and measured 50cm - a great size! The midwives also washed Oscar (both of us were covered in blood), and gave me some stitches. At the second try, I managed to take a shower (I got light-headed the first time). Oscar was very calm and content, and Chris and I were pretty excited and spent almost all the downtime calling family.
Oscar's weigh-inAt 1:30am or so Chris got our things together, I got dressed and the midwives called us a taxi home. We got my brother to come help us get me upstairs (again all those stairs!), and by 2am, Oscar, Chris and I were all already laying in bed again. There is amazing postpartum care in Germany - our postpartum midwife Nadja has been visiting us every day and checking up on Oscar and me, and she will continue to come as long and often as needed in the next few weeks. Oscar and I basically haven't left the bed in these three days, and the first time we have to is for his doctor's appointment next Tuesday.
Pretty long story considering how little time it actually took, huh? We were quite amazed how fast it went, and we're so happy everything went well, and just in time. Afterwards, Christine told us that the midwife from our last prenatal appointment had warned all her colleagues in the group meeting to be prepared for a possible home birth for me. Apparently she had thought we might not make it to the birth center in time.
Chris adds:
After I read Tanja's post and then talking together at lunch we realized that the "craziest moments" for each of us were totally different. For Tanja it was at home waiting for Robert, and riding in the cab. For me it was the last bit of the cab ride and the delivery. Since I can't leave well enough alone I want to add my two cents.
When Clara and I went up the meteorological tower at my work (see the view here - if you zoom way in you can see the Fernsehturm) I asked her if we were up very high. She said "no, we are not high. We have to go higher!" I was kind of disappointed in how blase she was, but I guess Clara's "standard tower" is Marien-Kirche in Stralsund, taller than the pyramids, and from 1625 to 1647 the tallest building in the world.
Tanja is never one to complain, so I had no idea that while we were waiting for Robert her contractions had gotten so close together. I was running around charging camera batteries and washing tomatoes, and when Tanja's dad told me over the phone that he was going to stay up until he got the news I told him "No, go to sleep! This baby's probably not coming until the middle of the night". (I called him again about an hour later to congratulate him on his new grandson...)
When I went down to the cab I took down the carseat and our bag full of documents, clothes, etc. I told him to start the meter, and that we were just waiting for my brother-in-law, and that we'd be down in a second. The cabbie asked where we were going, and when I said "Westend" (a neighborhood of Berlin, but also the name of the hospital right next to the birth center) he put two and two together and asked "Klinikum?" (Hospital?). Clearly not impressed...
We got downstairs a few seconds before Robert arrived, and while I knew things were urgent I still didn't realize just how urgent it was. In the cab Tanja was clearly working hard on not having the baby (she told me today "I was trying to concentrate on the individual letters of advertisements"). The cabbie was at first taking it slow, I think so that the speedbumps in our neighbourhood didn't bother Tanja. About a third of the way there, when Tanja was now drenched in sweat and panting, he ran through a yellow that must have turned red as we crossed. Two thirds of the way, when Tanja was now vocalizing, we got stuck behind several cars turning, and I could see in the rear-view mirror that he was now fairly concerned.
I wanted to ask Tanja if she was pushing already, but I didn't want to freak her out more (I think I didn't really want to know the answer either). When we were almost there I tried calling the midwife, because now I knew how close we were getting to disaster (last time Tanja only started vocalizing during transition), but I didn't get through to her. When we got to the birth center I helped Tanja out and yelled to the cabbie that I'd be back in a minute.
The next minute or so is missing from my memory. I guess when we got into the birth center I left Tanja at the door (!?!) and ran down the hall yelling for Christine (the midwife). When I saw her I remember yelling "Tanja drückt schon!!" (Tanja's pushing already), and then my memory is blank again. The next thing I remember is that Tanja and I were in the middle of the hallway, and Christine came running towards us, telling us to come into the birth room. Tanja said she couldn't, and Christine was like "you're doing this, it's no problem, here we go!" and basically picked Tanja up and walked her to the room.
The next few minutes were the craziest for me. We got to the room and Christine organized everything she needed with amazing speed. She was super professional, and while the whole situation was overwhelming, her obvious experience and confidence put me at ease. At some point I asked Christine if I had time to go to the cab. I really didn't want to leave (I wasn't there when Clara was born, after all), but he had all of our original documents (passports etc.) and I didn't want him to drive off. I sprinted through the hall once more each way, carrying everything on the way back and hoping I wouldn't slip on the floor! Basically seconds after I got back the water broke (exploded is more like it), and two minutes later Oscar came. In one push his head and one arm were out, and with the next he flew (honestly, through the air!) out of Tanja. I guess we really were there seven minutes, but it felt more like 3-4 to me!
The moment right after the birth was probably the scariest for me, but very quickly it was clear that Tanja was ok, and once Oscar started crying and it was clear he was doing great! Because of the lack of earlier preparation it was a bit difficult to get Oscar into Tanja's arms and both of them into bed, but once they were there we all rejoiced and laughed at how well everything had gone. The next three hours were very sweet, and for once the time zone difference to North America was useful, and we called both our families. It was especially fun for me to call Tanja's Mom, Dad, and brother, because I had just spoken with them less than an hour earlier!
Later that night when we were all at home we both finally started thinking about how close we came to disaster. If there was ever an advertisement for having a home birth this was surely it!
Oscar Update
Our home visit midwife was just here, and weighed Oscar again. He's now 3100g (6lb 13oz), already bigger than he was when he was born!
1 comment:
Wow! What a birth story! That must have been such a tough taxi ride, Tanja. And how funny that the timing worked out just like you had been hoping it would. I'm glad you got to the birth center in time.
What sweet pictures of Clara holding Oscar.
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